100 Things Not To Do At Hogwarts
by Daddys Little Demon
Summary: Two Riddles the A twins Death Duckys and Marriage Contracts Hogwarts is in for a Beating when Abi and Ailish are realeased Will it surrvive
1. Rule 1

This is 100 things not to do at Hogwarts We know it's been done before but we hope to make you laugh

Written by Ailish (You Electrify My Life) and I

Enjoy!

**Disclaimer: we do not own Harry Potter**

**Rule 1 **** I am not allowed to claim that growing marijuana or hallucinogenic mushrooms is "Extra Herbology Work"**

A high pitched scream rang throughout the halls of Hogwarts in the great hall everyone looked

Up but continued eating waiting to see what entertainment the two girls would bring them today

At the Head table the three professors sitting in a row all looked straight at the doors waiting for

The chaos to start.

These three professors were called Professor McGonagall the head of Gryffindor and she

Thanked god every day for putting the two girls in Slytherin.

The professor on the left however was not so lucky around the school there was a rumour that

the two girls in question were the reason for the grey streak he had gained ever since they

joined the school 5 years ago not only being the head of Slytherin he was there main victim making fun

of his last name (it being Snape and that was too funny not to make fun of) as well as getting revenge

when he punished but he hardly ever punished them for

their misdeeds but he didn't bother too often because apart from never being caught they were

the best students in their year

The last professor in the row was Albus Dumbledore himself he looked at the doors waiting for

his secret favourite students although he loved all his students he couldn't help admiring how well

they pulled all the mischief they got into.

Another scream filled the air followed by a cry of

"Ailish I'm gonna kill you"

A girl with short blonde-brown hair ran in followed by a girl with green hair

Both continued to run around the hall screaming and shouting threats until Abi shopped straight in

Front of the head table her eyes glazed over and she started shaking she gave a scream and dived

over the head table knocking a jug of orange juice onto professor McGonagall's lap and landing on

Professor Snape's she hid her head in his chest and started shrieking about Pink Hephalump

The whole hall turned to look at Ailish she was glaring at an empty spot

Abi gave another shriek and pulled out a tub of salt throwing it at the ground, evil laughter filled the air coming from Ailish

She pulled out a pen and clicked the top then swung it at the empty space killing the hephalump

Abi let out a sigh of relief and jumped off Snape's lap hugged the other girl then both skipped to the Slytherin table laughing and talking

Ailish got out her wand and turned Abi's hair to its normal blonde

In sync both girls spread peanut butter on toast and started to eat it seemingly unaware of the rest of the students and the teachers looking at them

They both finished their toast in time for the bell

"Come on them herbology" Ailish said getting up and grabbing her bag Abi did the same they linked arms and skipped off to the green houses

Both sitting down at one of the table in the green house in front of Harry Potter and Ron Weasley they pulled out the work the class had been doing for the last week

The door opening announced professor sprout arriving

"Good morning class"

"Good Morning professor" the gryffindor's coursed the Slytherins stayed quiet

"Now let's see your projects"

Professor Sprout started walking down the green house commenting on the projects and giving congratulations to Neville's green plant thingy

When she get to the A twins she stopped

"Where's your project girls"

"Right he..."Abi Started then turned to look at Ailish "she ate them"

Both teacher and student turned to look at Ailish her pupils were dilated and she was shaking

"Abi I see them, I see them the creatures ohh the red ravens beautiful"

"Miss Riddle what exactly did you grow"

"Why Magic Mushrooms Miss after all they have magic at the beginning"

"That is not an except able project not to mention dangerous"

"Ohh she'll be fine she's only seeing the things I always see"

"Miss Riddle takes Miss Riddle to the hospital wing"

"Fine" Abi turned "hey where is she"

There on Draco Malfoy's lap was a half naked Ailish looking through his hair looking for mini cucumbers

"I'll get her" Abi sighed walking over to Ailish and getting her to follow her they both walked out the green house


	2. Rule 2

RULE 2 - Do not throw grapes at the Slythierin Prince.

It's a dull, gray Thursday at the end of September. Abi and Ailish are on their way to breakfast in the great hall, they usually get there by skipping, but today Abi decided to give Ailish a piggy-back. As they came shooting around a corner, Ailish started shouting as if in a betting shop, cheering on a horse. Abi ran into the great hall and over to the Slytherin table where none other than Draco Malfoy was sat. He turned to face them.

"What the hell are you doing?" He asked giving them both dirty looks.

"As a matter of fact - " Abi began with a wide grin on her face.

"I was being given a piggy-back and must return the favour on the way to next lesson." Ailish stated nodding her head trying not to laugh at the look of confusion on Malfoy's face.

He turned back to his cronnies Crabbe and Goyle, it was obvious that he was going to "try" to ignore them. The girls sensed this and knew exactally what to do to ensure this didn't happen. While Ailish piled food on her plate as a distraction, Abi grabbed the grape bowl and hid it under the table. They started to make fake conversation about how teddy bears would rule the world one day.

"I think a giant teddy bear with sharp teeth and weird eyes will come and eat all the ikkle firsties" Ailish said and the look of horror on the first years faces caused Blaize Zabini to spit his pumpkin juice all over them. Then, Abi tossed a graped at Malfoy's head.

"Who threw that?" He exclaimed, it was apparent that the Slytherin Prince didn't like to have fun.

When no one answered him, he turned back to his breakfast and acted as if nothing happened. Malfoy let out a laugh - at something that probably wasn't funny - and then another grape hit him o the top of his head. Again he turned, but this time his eyes scanned the table for the grape bowl. He looked as if he was about to bite someone. His eyes immediately moved to the two girls when he couldn't see the bowl.

"Hand over the grapes girls" It came out quite politely for Malfoy.

They looked at each other, then at Malfoy.

"Bite me Malfoy" Abi said smirking.

He was just staring blankly at them. Slowly, they both reached and took a handful of grapes, smiling while doing so.

"Okay, you want the grapes? Here!" Ailish said and the both launched the grapes at Malfoy, then they simultaniously stood up. With a quick high-five they ran off towards first class, leaving their victim gob-smacked in his seat.


	3. Rule 3

RULE 3 - It is not necessry to yell "BURN!" whenever Snape takes points away from Gryffindor

Now it was Ailish's turn to give a piggy-back, so with Abi on-board they ventured into the dark dungeons. Abi was making car noises, and even the occasional police siren could be heard. The dungeons were damp and cold so their pretend super-villain capes would not keep them warm, that's for sure. Chatter could be heard up ahead, Snape was always late letting his classes in. Just as the girls reached the group of students the door opened.

"Good morning class" he drawled. By the sound of it he had never had a good morning in his life. "Come in" as he said this, he stepped back to allow people to enter the room.

"Hi, Sir!" Abi and Ailish smiled at him as they walked in, they were far to cheerful for him, but it wasn't like he was gonna punnish them. His reply was just a weak smile.

Everyone took their seats and removed their books from their bags. Professor Snape made his way to the front of the classroom. On his way he had to pass Neville Longbottom, a boy that was very afraid of him. Of course, Neville fell off his chair and the whole class started to laugh. He got up, blushing, and sat back on his chair staring at his hands.

"Silence!" Snape called, and the class went silent. "5 points from Gryffindor" He added.

"BUUUUUURN!" The two troublesome girls shouted and then shared a high five. They only received a warning glare from Snape.

"Sir, that's not fair! Neville didn't do anything wrong and -" Harry began, but was cut short.

"Another 5 points from Gryffindor" With that all of the Gryffindors let out a groan.

"BUUUUUURN!" They shouted again. This time, Snape turned around and continued with his lesson.

"So, today we will be making Veritaserum. Who can tell me what Veritaserum is?" Snape asked.

As always, only Hermione Granger put her hand up. Abi and Ailish knew the answer, they just couldn't be bothered to raise their hand. Everyone, even Hermione, knew that Snape wouldn't pick her to answer, but the thing that confused everyone is why she still put her hand up.

"Anyone?" Snape said as if no one had their hand up. He hated Gryffindors, and that was what the girls loved about him. "Veritaserum -" He began.

"Is a very powerful truth serum that is most commonly used in interrogation. The potion effectively forces the drinker to answer any question put to them truthfully, though there are some difficult methods of resistance." Hermione finnished. Everyone in the room was staring at her - she had never called out in class, especially not when a teacher was talking. Snape had a shocked look on his face.

"How dare you Miss Granger! That little stunt has just earned you 1 weeks detention and 20 points from Gryffindor" He was now smirking at the umimpressed look on Hermione's face.

"DOUBLE BUUUUUUURN!" The girls exclaimed, gaining them dirty looks from the whole of Gryffindor 5th year. They just laughed and showed their apreciation by sticking their fingers up. Just then the bell rang, and the girls had already packed up their things so they swept out of the room.

"Later losers!" They called over their shoulder.


End file.
